Getting past psychological blocks that stop you from having your dream job

I’m writing this article as 1^stFebruary has arrived. Funny thing about February – in that all those New Year Resolutions are a long distant memory and more than likely have been broken and faded into obscurity. This is particularly true if you are a job seeker, as enthusiasm tends to wane after a few weeks – as the reality of the job search process hits hard!

The fundamental truth about job-hunting is that it ‘sucks’! I mean it is hard to stay positive, when you get another rejection letter, and job-hunting is a really stressful experience (no denying it).

No wonder so many of us stay put in less than satisfactory jobs, as we don’t want to deal with another ‘rejection letter’. Does that sound like you?

But the reality is, that the biggest impendent to our success, is not the reality of job-hunting, (although it can be really tough) but those thoughts or beliefs that right now are preventing you from getting exactly what you want. That internal dialogue is stopping you from achieving career success!

But it is important to realise that most of these thoughts, beliefs, convictions and mindsets are false. So, the first step is to take some time and write a list of your favourite mindsets or beliefs that might be holding you back from getting your dream job. Here are a few that you may be familiar with:

• I don’t like job-hunting
• It is too expensive to get ‘top notch’ professional help with my job search
• I’m not the type to ‘big note’ myself
• I don’t have time to find a new job
• I’m not a good writer
• I’m not good at interviews
• I’m not good at networking
• I’m too old to get another job
• I’m no good at selling myself
• I can never seem to make the right first impression
• Nobody would be interested in me anyway

Now when faced with these psychological blocks, I love ‘The Work’ by Bryon Katie, who teaches a method of self-enquiry, in which you question those thoughts and turn them around, so they are no longer true.

So take your list of beliefs and simply ask yourself this series of questions for each of them.

• Is this thought/belief really true?
• How do I react, when I think that thought?
• What am I getting out of having this belief? (Hidden payoff)
• What is it costing me to believe this?
• Is this belief something I’m willing to let go of?
• Who would I be without this belief?

 

Now let’s apply this tool to one of your own beliefs. For example: The psychological block – I’m no a good at networking

Is this thought/belief really true?

I don’t like begging or asking people for a favour, plus networking does not work and is a waste of time and people will judge me in a negative light.

But is this really true? Well I know experts say that effective networking is not about asking for a job, it is about making connections and these networking connections work.

What am I getting out of having this belief? (Hidden payoff)

I feel better, as I don’t have to get out of my comfort zone and can stay put were I am (nice and secure – although it is boring and I’m underpaid).

 

What is it costing me to believe this 

I miss out on the following benefits:

• Guidance from industry contacts and the ability to gain further insight into what is happening in the sector;
• New friendships;
• Opportunities not only in work, but new trends and techniques;
• A support network and professional contacts that you can utilised in the time of need;
• The opportunity to help others in your networking circle (benefits always arise from helping others);
• An ability to discover new learning opportunities and engage with new people that will enhance your life;
• Increased status amongst professional peers;
• A resource centre for every aspect of your career success and challenges.

 

Who would you be without this belief?

I would benefit so much from the networking experience. I would be lot more relaxed about networking and see networking as a mutual and beneficial exchange between equals. I wouldn’t worry so much about being judged by people or be seen as a ‘desperado’.

Now turn this thought around.

I will be just fine at networking and will gain so much from it, so long as I focus on relationships; and I don’t have to be perfect.

You see, by turning your mindset around, you can make a huge difference to overcoming those psychological barriers to getting that dream job.